the relationship between twister and age

When adults get together, they can do stupid things. Not to say that kids don’t do stupid things when they get together, but they usually don’t know any better. Unless their parents told them not to do something stupid. You can probably count on them doing it. Right after you told them not to.

Now, take Twister. The game. What’s the social demographic for this game? I’d say 40% for 8-11 year olds. 30% for 12-13. 15% for 14-15. 5% for 16-17. And so on…

Notice as the age increases, the proportion of people playing lowers significantly (data not actually based on scientific figures).

There’s probably a reason for that.

So when Sam says we should play Twister, we all look at each other like what the fuck no way am I playing Twister that’s a stupid game that no one wants to play!

Five minutes later 6 of us are standing above the mat, beers in hands and arguing about how to play Twister. We couldn’t agree how to start. Jaro and I said on each roll (twist?) everyone went, it was a collective turn, but Sam was adamantly opposed to this and stated that each roll was one person’s turn. And I realized we were never going to win this argument, because really, we’re standing there drinking and arguing over the rules of Twister, one of the most self explanatory games ever invented.

Screw it! Ewa! (Ewa was designated roller. Her foot was broken.) Roll it!

As everyone knows, or, I would think everyone knows, Twister is pretty ridiculous. Your hands and feet are splayed across this mat filled with giant colored dots, and your face is stuck in some nook or cranny of your perspective neighbor. The beer probably didn’t help the situation. And it gets hard. Like it’s a workout. I mean really. At the end of the second game, it was just me and Sam left, and my arms are giving out. It looks like I’m doing the crab walk, with Sam arching over me in what looks to be some type of yoga move. Wait how did this happen? If she wasn’t a dancer I would’ve won by now damnit. And I’m still there, arms about to snap. Ewa is talking to Tamas or somebody and Ewa roll the damn thing!

I lost. But not before taking Sam out. Which is what I did in the last game too. Like dominoes.

The point of all this, and yes, there is a point: games are fun! Too many times we’re just sitting around discussing the universe, wondering what our real purpose in life is. And we could be playing fucking Twister instead!

So all of us are excited about this newfound knowledge. Oh yeah lets play games! Sam and I sit down. What games do you know? I don’t know any games. What do you know? Umm. I know telephone. But I hate that game. Well that’s great. I get online. I google group games. Its all children stuff. And exercise stuff. Ah! Idea! I google adult group games. This looks interesting. I click on the first link. Hmm. I don’t think this is an appropriate game… actually I’m fairly certain that’s not a game at all. I click on the next one. This one has ‘legitimate’ games, but its all stuff like ‘the name game’ and ‘the kissing game’ and ‘spin the bottle’ and I’m thinking huh this all sounds really familiar.

When adults get together, they’re just like a bunch of children. The rules are different, true, but the basic principles are the same. They entertain each other with what is around them. Usually, adults entertain with drinking, talking, smoking, dancing, and drinking. Now mash that together, and throw Twister into the mix.

When you’re bent over backwards with five people weighing down on you from all sides, you realize the recipe is stupid and seriously how did I get myself in this position (literally)?
Somehow, it just makes sense.